Colt Cabana arrives

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Colt Cabana arrives

Post  ColtCabana on Thu Jan 15, 2009 6:52 pm

A very loose camera, aiming on a crowd... scratchy noise of people and traffic. The camera turns up on a sign - Dublin Airport. A dark and strange assumed voice is heard through the noise: "Laaaaaaadies and Gentleman... hailing from Chicago, IL, USA... the stylin' and profilin', archaic charter airways flyin', later on filthy cabs ridin', bandana wearin', milk drinkin' son of a gun.... "The Classical One"... C-C-C-COLT.. CABAAANAA!!!".
The camera suddenly moves 180°, right into the smiling face of Colt Cabana, wearing a red headband with "Boom Boom" written on it, obviously very proud of his own camera work. "Finally, Colt Cabaaana haaas come to Dublin, Irela... oh, sorry Mam, my mistake. Now one of thousands passing by, soon the whole country, kids, parents and grandparents will scream, with tears in there eyes: (Colt continues in a high pitched assumed voice) Yeah, Colt... free us from this juggernaut reign of lousy wrestling and Mark Henry interviews... Colt 45, Colt 45!! (Colt continues talking in his normal voice) And they will get what they want!"

CUT

The Camera shows Colt Cabana sitting on a bench, the Dublin Airport in the background, a Twinkie in his right hand.
CC: "You know, Geeene..."
Voice of a young boy: "Dude... my name's not Geeene, what's wrong with you? I'm Josh."
CC: "Boooy... Josh. OK... it DOES MATTER what you name, i see your point. So Josh... hold the camera still. Josh, you read in - ahem - paper bout my.. arrival?"
Josh: "..."
CC: "Nah... you will, little booy, you will... in my vision i see you drawing signs with your friends, "COLT 45" or "Another Legdrop, Colt!", havin the fun of your..."
J: "I guarantee you i won't."
CC: "I see your a tough case, Jon..."
J: JOSH!
CC: Of course... sooo, Dublin. Wait... wait... there is this guy from here... remember Gabriel Byrne in Usual Suspects?
(Colt Cabana slips of the bench and acts like he was hit by a gun)
CC: "How you're doing Keaton? - I... c-can't feel my legs... Kaiser."
(The camera is put to the ground, the boy seems to walk away)
CC: "Drink your milk, say your prayers... and eat your vitamins... JOSH! (more silent) Tztztz... it's a classic."

ColtCabana

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